If life were a novel

I can't think of anything English major-y to write. You'd think this would be easy for a creative writing major like me! But alas, my creative juices are running low today, and I have nothing interesting to say.

If my life was like one of the stories I like to read, this blog would be a lot more exciting. If it was a science fiction novel, I would be sitting here deciding what to write, and then all at once an alien spaceship would appear outside my window, and aliens would come out and tell me that they have travelled back in time to protect me because the whole future of the universe depends on me, and the evil aliens are going to come back in time and try to destroy me. It would probably look something like this:

Or, if my life were like one of the Christian horror stories by Ted Dekker I like to read, I wouldn't be typing this on a blog, I would be writing it out in one of the Books of History that make everything written in them come true. Then, I would probably unintentionally bring evil into the world, and Marsuvees Black would wreck havoc on Millikin, like this:


Or if my life was like a soap opera, a random stranger would discover this blog, see my picture on it, and realize that he was my long lost father. He would come find me and explain to me that I was kidnapped at birth after the doctor in the hospital turned out to really be my birth mother's crazy ex-husband looking for revenge. Then he would ask me to come back with him to Alaska to live with him and his new wife who is my birth mother's long lost twin sister that he married when my mother fell off a cliff to her death (but he doesn't know that she didn't really die; she is living with the hobo who lives downstream that rescued her when she fell from the cliff). It might look a little like this:

 

Anyway, if you couldn't tell, I'm tired today, so my mind is all over the place. But things would definitely be interesting if real life was like the books/movies/television shows I'd like to write someday. We writers put our characters through a lot!

some other random stuff:
http://www.teddekker.com/home/ in case you want to check out Ted Dekker sometime!
http://engrishfunny.failblog.org/ These are really funny bad translations from different languages to English. (It sort of connects to being an english major because it's in English, right?)